Wikipedia Makes Me Laugh, Bitch!

Wikipedia has always been funny to me. Especially when they have a whole archive of information dedicated to common sense knowledge. Check out this excerpt from the article on "dap":

Dap is a form of handshake that originated in the 1960s among African Americans. The term dap may have originated as an acronym for Dignity and Pride, (or may have been backronymed) and was first used by African American soldiers during the Vietnam War. Though it can refer to many kinds of greeting involving hand contact, dap is best known as a complicated routine of shakes, slaps, snaps, and other contact that must be known completely by both parties involved. Some forms or other names for these greetings include "slapping five," "Black Power Handshake," "high five," "Five on the Black Hand Side," and "the pound" (as it is referred to by non African Americans unfamiliar with what Dap means). It is often confused with the word "tap".

A Moment of Silence, Bitch...

Kanye's mom passed Saturday (Nov. 10th, 2007) in a Los Angeles hospital. They say it had something to do with plastic surgery. It's a damn shame. Jigga even paid his respect to Kanye's mom at his concert in New York by calling for a moment of silence for Donda West. Jigga dedicating the whole show to Kanye saying, "We got you, Kanye, stay strong." It goes without saying that this must be a major heartbreak for Kanye. Prayers and thoughts go to the West clan.

Newsflash, Bitch!

I like girls wit nice titties. Areolas can't be all huge and shit. Nipples should be small. No dark nipples either.

-Word

Profanity, Bitch!

These British dudes have been doing a study on profanity in the workplace. They found that cussin' amongst coworkers promotes unity and helps alleviate stress/anger. Go figure. The study continues to report that this only applies to employees on the same level meaning that this whole profanity deal does not work in terms of managers, bosses, and the higher ups. Next time you at work don't be scared to drop that M-Bomb. You know the one I'm talkin about.

-Mutherfukkingangsterparty

Straight Up Bitch

You're a bitch. Your friends are bitches. Your nigga's friends are bitches. Your mom is a bitch. Your step mom is a bitch. Your roomate is a bitch. If any of thee above got shit to say to me I'll tell em in their face: You a bitch!

Christmas, Bitch

Halloween is done. Thanksgiving is coming up. After that is Christmas. I just want to let all the kiddies know that Santa is not real. That mutherfukker never existed. You know the presents you got under the tree? You parents go to work every fukkin day to earn the money to buy the bullshit toys that you have been crying about since watching a random commercial during the 1,000th episode of pokemon. If Santa is real, he'd be a bitch nigga. Ask Riley.

And Yes, Nigga, I'm sure he is not real.